The very point of the title of my blog is to remind myself to live in the moment, not in the past and not in hope for the future..to be in the reality that is right now. It seems ive been having alot of trouble with that lately. I keep imagining myself in my best friends bedroom laying in bed with the windows open, warm summer breeze blowing thru listening to whatever song jacob found that reminded him of me....i miss the crazy nights with my best friends, i miss feeling so sexy and like a queen because i always went out with jacob and his 2 best friends which i think all liked me...they were great self esteem boosters.....i miss the random days of playing speed in the middle of the day and the great food....i miss the awesome laid back job, i miss being about to wear shorts or a slutty skirt at any given time, i miss the awesome tan i had and the way my body was so perfectly fit (probably from the insane amount of time i spent swimming and dancing). i miss the amazing sex, the deep satisfaction of love, i miss waking up to him....I miss the adventures with lokopants, i miss the freedom, and the lakehouse weekends...blowin my best friends hippo lol. i want it all back. I was truly happy in every way possible.... the one song that brings back all of these memories is teh very first song he ever played for me...he said he was in tampa visiting his gf and he couldnt stop thinking about me...he found this song and played it on replay loudly at his gfs house, laid on her bed thinking about me...he called me as soon as he left and asked if he could see me when he got back. he was completely infatuated with me after just a matter of a couple days...i made the song his ring tone, and it will always make me smile....
so the moral of this story is i suck at living in the moment bc the past is so much better than right now lol. 143 Jacob.
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