just when it seems nothing else could possibly go wrong, my life keeps finding ways to prove me wrong. its 4am, and for some reason I'm rolling around in bed. i was damn near passed out about an hour ago. maybe it has something to do with the cat meowing, the dog making weird sounds, and the radio being on... after an hour of rolling i decided to get on facebook only to see natty jo deleted me from his friends. i don't even know what to think about this whole situation. i keep thinking is this shit real? apparently it is...just its all so sudden and out of the blue, i don't understand how i even got to this point.
I'm doing my best to just stay happy and not think about it because thinking about it depresses me. so I've stayed busy and hung out with friends. tonight i had a great time just hanging out with jwoww and bieber and his friends, it was so different than most times we go out. i guess maybe natty jo saw my status update about having fun and seen my picture change and got upset and decided to delete me. i guess i should just let him go and try to get over it, but its all out of the blue. i don't know why i want to talk to him so damn bad. every time i check his page i always say damn that was a bad idea why did i do that...so i don't know why i keep doing it. now i just feel sick. tomorrow is going to be such a long day. i have work until 3 then class until like 8.
at least i can't sit on facebook all day because i dropped my phone and broke the screen so i had to buy a new one. i hope things start coming together for me soon...this week has been terrible. i keep thinking what else could possibly happen?! and then something else happens and I'm always baffled...i am doing my best to stay positive and see the bright side to all this bullshit. like my roommate when ape shit on us so we told the office and they said if she doesn't play nice shes out. then i lost my bus pass and had to get another one. then the shit with natty Jo, i lost him because he went thru my stuff and decided he couldn't handle this 'relationship' anymore...downside i miss him like hell, upside..
i guess i can start moving on and try to make myself happy and maybe he will be happier too. i hope we can stay friends. then broke my phone....upside i did it within the 30 days so i still get the discounted price, downside i have to buy a new phone...i guess another upside is i need a new phone anyway. its like starting over right? I'm so sad about the way everything is going but I'm happy no one is leaving me alone. night time is the hardest, but i guess i have to feel the pain at some point. all i can do is take this one day at a time.
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